What happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas.

These were some of the lessons extracted from my travels...
(Disclaimer: This is more about the experience than the photos. I only snapped 3 of these photos with my SLR. Can you guess which ones? )

1. Make sure you know the name of your restaurant or you may end up at a strip joint being asked to sign in for the next pole dance and have a star stamped on your hand the rest of the night as embarrassing proof.

2. Wear comfy shoes over fashion. A must if you don't want to be crippled. Or carry your shoes all night.

3. No point in gondolay rides unless you have your honey man with you. You will be serenaded love songs in Italian ALONE.

And making out with your sister may get googly eyes.

4. Park in the right parking lot or you could end up climbing 10 flights of stairs and in line to get a job at the Paris hotel or as a stripper.

5. Keep your lunch reservations or you could end up at crappy take out paying a fortune for crap food. And have heartburn for hours.

6. Don't take cameras on the roller coaster (even point and shoots tucked in your inside coat pocket) and if you do make sure to keep it hidden away or you will be kicked off the ride and escorted out like a criminal.

7. It pays to know people who know great food joints. Cafe society rocked! 5 stars for presentation, food, and service. Who knew pea soup could be so good.

8. Reserve meltdowns in the event expensive purchases go missing until the trunk is completely empty. (ie. mac makeup in tiny black bags)

9. If you stay at a nice hotel, such as the venetian, don't be satisfied with subpar bedding- particularly down comforters with hard crunchy lumps that feel like bones crushed up inside. It may take 5 or 6 attempts, but eventually persistence will pay off when you finally get a nice, soft replacement and a partial night's rest.

12. Altitude changes, smoke, allergens, flashing lights, and lack of sleep can make for lots of sneezing and vertigo. Make sure to bring drugs.

13. Don't let a stranger take a photo of you at night with a point and shoot or you will end up with his lover in the background making hand gestures and a really crappy image as a momento of your first night.

14. If you only get one good shot with your sisters, make sure to adjust necklace prior and stand in the shade to avoid strange sun spots and squinty eyes.

15. Slots, booze, and hookers are not required for a good time, but if you are going to try the slots a short tutorial may be a good idea so you don't look like an idiot. Also, make sure to bring ear plugs because the wheel of fortune slots will continually make noise the entire 4 hours you are stuck at the airport and nearly drive you mad.

(Pic taken with iphone.)

Hope these lessons can help you should you ever find yourself in Vegas.